Steve (Newark)  


Not sure if you are aware of this, but pj and I are fantasy baseball experts. In fact, i'd go so far as to say we are real baseball experts. And it burns us that Steve just doesn't except our word as gospel. He'd rather quote random guys who work for even though they have no idea as to what they are talking about. From a guy who is so distrustful of the regular media, we are perplexed why he continues to rely on them for sports.

Regardless, during an chat, pj and i were posting questions for our own amusement. We might be the only two people in the world to find these funny, and maybe it's a bit weird that we'd use such a huge nationwide forumn for our inside jokes, but we try and post the most markish sports comments from "Steve (Newark)".

I got one in that said something like "why dont you just admit that Brad Wilkerson sucks and you have no idea what you are talking about". The guy disagreed with that statement and went on and on about how grade wilkerson is and how hot he's been (btw, he's one of the two guys that my vodoo worked on).

Now, usually i get a big kick out of getting a question posted. But, this took on a whole new level when i learned that steve read the chat a few days later, saw the guy's answer and FINALLY decided to pick the up guy in his league. he didn't even notice that HE was the one who asked the question!

I'm not sure why i'm taking such pleasure in this, b/c honestly, i am slightly offended that he doesn't respect our opinions enough to admit that we know more than these prorfessionals. The chances of steve reading this chat were so small to begin with. Then, to actually see the question i posted as a joke and take it as seriously is even slimmer. THEN, to not notice it was us writing it. Oh man, it makes all the hours i've wasted posting questions in chats worth it.

bring on the russian women  


so, the united states men's basketball team, the "dream team" if you will, is shooting poorly from behind the arc. How poorly? well, there is only one team shooting at a worse percentage....the russian women!! Uh, that's pretty bad.

oh, and why is the nfl now going to be even stricter in terms of not allowing defensive backs to touch the wide receivers? Did they even watch the games last year? If anything, you should allow MORE contact. I'm sick of teams just tossing the ball up there and hoping to draw a flag. Yes, scoring will be up, but at what cost? It's boring and it's impossible to play defense.


4:30 am  


and i was awaken b/c the movie on tbs was that bad that it was destroying my sub conscious. I think it's called air speed or something. a girl is in an airplane by herself and soemoen on the ground has to talk her down. this is the cheapest set i've ever seen. on the ground, they actually have the walls blacked out so they didn't have to pay for a set. I can't describe it. The guy is sitting next to what looks to be a commodore 128 and it's all black around him.

the itialian looking dude (the bad guy in godfather 3, the father in "the last don) is in this movie. what's he doing in something this bad?

Seacrets Continued  


It's been so long since I wrote about that bar that i can't recapture my anger. Just accept the fact that it was a corny bar that did not deserve the love that it got from part of the group. But, my main problem was that even IF it was the greatest bar in the world, going so many times in a week was just completely unjustified.

We went there on the 2nd night and it was apparent that we'd be making a late week run at it again. I didn't care for that decision, but could accept it, as the first night we were in OC, the place was packed and we assumed that the same would be true the next saturday. So that's 2 nights out of the 7 day week. Completely acceptable, given the circumstances. It's the middle night that came out of nowhere that really irked me and inevitably led to the tainting of the third night.

Without getting into the gory details, suffice to say, there were two "groups" within the house. A lame and annoying catfight basically seperated the house and created uneeded tension. Hanging out with group "A" during the day, I figured i'd might as well go to dinner w/ group A and then hopefully everyone could just meet up at the same bar later in the night. Of course, this meant i'd have to miss out on the greatest of all dinners: the prime rib / seafood buffet. Is there a bigger sacrafice one can make than to give up unlimited hunks of beef? I think not. But, as corny as it sounds, i considered the day to be a bonding experience and wanted to complete it w/ going to dinner with the group. So, as everyone left to gorge themselves at the trough of prime rib freedom, i waited [and waited. and waited. and waited.] for these other people to get ready.
Ok, i think i need a siderant within this rant. It's a combo rant on being late and taking a long time to get ready (maybe i should have written that the other way around). There are few things i find more disgusting, egotistical, and inhumane as spending insane amounts of time to get ready. I can't even fathom the amount of arrogance it takes for someone to sit there and honestly think that it takes them x HOURS to get ready. I hate to break it to you, ladies, but you aren't that important. Your existence does not define the universe. The sun will continue to rise in the east and set in the west regardless of how perfect your mascare looks. What is the point of this vanity? Who are you trying to impress? Trust me, the 20 year old boys would come up to you anyway even if everything wasn't "just so". Any decent guy wouldn't care about the miniscule differences that you spend so much time trying to fix. That leads me to believe that it's not the decent guy you care about impressing, but the male counterpart who equals your shallowness.

Anyway, i could almost tolerate the hours of preperation that nobody cares about IF said people actually started on time. As in, if it takes you three friggin hours to get ready, then start the process three hours before we are supposed to leave!!! But oh no, that would actually require consideration for your fellow man. And that can't happen. No, what actually went on in OC was a select few complaining about "we have to leave early tonight so we can spend a super duper amount of time at Seacrets" and then THESE VERY SAME PEOPLE being the last ones to be ready. Do people not realize this irony?

So anyway, as inevitable as death and taxes, so too is the fact that this group was always late. And this night was no exception. Hmm, maybe i should stop writing in red b/c the mini rant is over. But, to recap, being "late"'when other people are involved shows a complete lack of respect for that person. There's no such thing as a person who is always late. Rather, that person is just someone who refuses to consider other people over themselves. Clocks exist. Figure out how much time you need, and then count backwards from when you need to leave by. It's not brain surgery!

i'm going to stop for now, but i'll be back in a few....

lack of sleep  


does anyone really know what it's like not to sleep? It's a cruel fate. Currently, I'm going through a cycle where I don't have a problem falling asleep, but then i wake up in a panic within 20 minutes. I'm having a reoccuring nightmare that is beyond ridiculous (it's not even "scary" per se). Then i wake up completely confused trying to figure out if i'm in OC or not. I would say no less than 10 times in the past week I've waken up trying to figure out how many people are staying in this room with me. Then i realize it's my apartment in newark. Then i realize said apartment is NOT in OC. Then i realize it's only 20 minutes from when i tried to go to sleep.

This feeling of not quite asleep and not quite awake is brutal. The actual "going" to sleep makes me tired, but then the panicy waking up makes me alert. Or at least quasi alert. I feel too tired to sleep, if that makes sense. I want to dig a hole and crawl into it. Hours mean nothing to me at this point. Next time i look at hte clock, it will be 4 am and i'll think i have the whole day ahead of me. Then it will be 7 pm and i'll wonder where the day went.

I need to win the lottery. I can't exist in a normal 9-5 world.

[and yes, i'm writing this at 11:30 pm. leave me alone]



Before the ocean city trip, i had two concerns: 1) nobody would want to go out and we'd spend the week drinking in the house. and 2) we'd go to a "good" bar the first night, and love it so much that we'd waste the rest of the week going back there.

Now, luckily, OC didn't turn into the debacle that the skiing trip apparently was. The people I went on vacation with actually wanted to enjoy life and such and such. However, on a 7 night trip, we somehow managed to go to this corny bar/club "seacrets" a whopping 4 times!!!

The best way to describe Seacrets was that it was "like Disney World wrapped up in a bar". Why is that the best way to describe it? B/c not only did i say that (as a negative), but someone actually said that as a positive. That's right, apparently people want to go to a bar that reminds them of the cliched corporate interpretation of what a beach bar should look like. It's like going to Italy and looking for an Olive Garden to eat dinner.

It's hard to describe the physical layout of Seacrets, but here it goes. When you first walk in, there is a huge area where bands play. I was mildly impressed with the fact that there were two mini stages for the bands, so as one was finishing the next band could start right away. The corniness factor kicks in immediately, though, when you look down and realize the floor is all sand. Lame. Then, there all fake palm trees under this tent to give the "atmosphere" of a beach bar. The only thing that was missing were the mechanical jamberee bears that we found all so entertaining at eight years of age.

The trickery of Seacrets continued as there were tons of small bars scattered around the pathway. I will fully grant that this "complex" was enormous for a bar/club, but it was all smoke and mirrors. Under no circumstances would anyone go to these little bars scattered around the water. They were litterally a little shack w/ bar stools around it. Oh, actually, people would actually stop at these bars if they were bored out of their minds and wanted to get away from the "seacrets scene". I know b/c Dan and I couldn't wait to leave the niteclub area the first night.

But regardless, the point of these bars was to show off how big the place was w/o actually putting the land to any good use. "oh look at how big this place is, we should spend the entire week here exploring". And by exploring, i mean of course going to the club and dancing there for 4 straight hours.

Ok, as I'm sure you've gathered by now, there was a night club as the "2nd" attraction. It was decent, relatively speaking. There were several very corny gimmicks that certain people just ate up. First, there was confetti that fell down every few minutes. At best it was a mildly entertaining visual the first 20 times it happened. At worst, it was painfully annoying as the stuff got caught on your shirt and fell in your drink. 2nd, there were gigantic balloons that would slowly decend onto the dance floor. This led to the inevitable need to punch the balloons back up in the air. I have to admit that I enjoyed doing this as well. Then again, I'm the type of person who can spin a roll of masking tape up in the air in my apartment for 3 straight hours and not think twice of it.

The final gimmick was by far the most overated. The floor "bounced". The way it was described, you'd think we'd be on a trom-bumb-balino. However, the "bounce" was basically what you would find by walking on those metal doors that lead to basement entrances on the street. Yes there was some give and when the whole crowd did it at once, you could actually feel it. Big deal. Next.

[to be continued. i need to go to school now.]



Is there an athlete worth rooting for more than Carlos Delgaldo? You have to respect anyone who refuses to salute the flag. His political views are so inspiring. But, his greatness is even apparent on the field.

In last night's game, he tried to break up a double play by plowing into Mienkewitz at 2nd base (yes, he was playing 2nd). The redsox were all crying like the girls that they are. Delgaldo just put his head down and walked to the dugout.

Later in the game, when Delgaldo came up again, he got hit. Did he charge the mound? No, he put his head down and ran to first while everyone out went nuts.

Carlos Delgaldo: my hero.

i'm back  


I've been meaning to write something since the bar's been over. I feel bad for all of you who have been checking this site in these past two months. Actually, substitute the word "bad" for "freaked out". What is wrong with you people? I told you I wasn't going to post.

I'll try and think of something to write tonight and post again. I feel like i need to pick something extra rage-inducing to make up for lost time.