My mini revolution against page 3:  


1) The article that set me off:

[note, it used to say "no bread for you". After my email, he must have changed it to the correct "no soup for you"]

2) my email: wow, you butchered the most overused and cliched seinfeld line of all time!

Way to exploit the current renewed interest in

Seinfeld (b/c of the dvds) for your own personal gain.
While this article has nothing to do with sports, at
least you'll get a lot of hits riding on their

Next time, though, you may want to take your head out
of your ass and get the quote right. Seriously, even
the biggest mark knows it's "No soup for you". I
believe even my retarded 4 year old nephew can walk
around and say that.

Page 3 is a joke, and you are at the forefront
throwing around screwed up punchlines. Your mom must
be proud.

Happy Thanksgiving,


3) His Response:

Congratulations! You, the anonymous Dennis J., known around the world
"krofatigue," as are officially the winner of the Rudest E-mail Ever.
trust me, you beat some stiff competition over the years.)

The reason? It's Thanksgiving, dude. I missed a word. How bad is your
that things like this inspire such a reaction from you?

My mom must be proud, you say. She is. She raised a son who doesn't
send out
insulting e-mails on Thankgiving because someone made an honest mistake
botching one word out of 3,500. Can't speak for all moms on that,


P.S. C'mon, you're not old enough to have a 4-year-old nephew, are you?
I'm guessing you've got the day off from high school today.

4) My retort


You dismissed my earlier email as a juvenile and unjustified attack of your work; being overly critical of one incorrect word in 35,000. I suppose such a dismissal isn’t to be unexpected as I wasn’t going to go into the depths of why your article is worthy of such ire. However, now that I know you actually read your emails, let me explain:

First, a general assessment of and page 3.

I think it’s a great danger to view things such as your article in isolation. To do so would be to allow virtually anything to seep into society as anything can be justified as “hey, it’s not the end of the world.” However, your article is a microcosm of everything that is wrong with and page 3 (and, to a larger extent, society).

The ONLY motivating factor in society is money. Corporations exist only to generate money. There is no appreciation of the arts, general interest in benefiting society, or even an attempt to put out a quality product. ESPN is clearly the most “important” sports website because it’s the most popular. However, its content is two notches below mediocre. My appreciation of sports has not been increased in the slightest by I can’t even stomach sportscenter. In fact, in an informal poll of “real” sports fans, I have been unable to find a SINGLE PERSON who watches sportscenter on any consistent basis.

Any freshmen who has taken an intro to microeconomics course would argue that if espn isn’t satisfying the demand for sports fans, then another company will step up. However, that is not the case. The hardcore sports fans, of which I am one, will ALWAYS be there. We’ll grumble and complain, but in the end, our love of sports will force us to keep coming back for more. Thus, unfortunately, ESPN is doing the “business appropriate” thing by catering to the casual fair-weather fans. Ratings and revenue are generated by drawing in as many people as possible. Thus, all genres are plagued by the desire of the corporations to suck in the casual fans. Sportscenter has less to do with sports now and more in common with MTV (which doesn’t even play music anymore!).

I can’t even tell you how many times I’ve been “tricked” into clicking on an article at only to be bait-and-switched. I can honestly say that I’ve learned absolutely nothing about sports from either the website or the channel. Have you tried watching the NBA show (I forget the name, something about Fastbreak) with Steven A. Smith. It’s a disgrace to sports.

Page 3 is by far the most shockingly blatant example of such exploitation of the “art” of sports. If is insulting to real sports fans, at least Page 3 is upfront with their “screw you, we don’t care what you want” promotion of the “entertainment” side of it.

Page 3 exists SOLELY to keep people “stuck” on as long as possible. It’s all about generating revenue and getting those big bucks from advertisers. It both exploits average people and is insulting to real sports fans who wish to enjoy their hobby and become more intelligent on the subject.

Now, an assessment of your article in particular.

Your article was one of the “most sent stories” for several days. I resisted as long as I could, but in the end, my enjoyment of Seinfeld forced me to click on the link. As soon as I saw “no bread for you”, I realized that my initial reservations were correct. Your “article” (and I use that term loosely) isn’t so much a “writing” as it is a trick to sell advertisements.

Was there an original thought in your article? If so, please point me towards it. All I saw was you riding the coattails of the success of Seinfeld. Here is how your thought process must have went: “hmm, people like Seinfeld. If I write about Seinfeld, people will click on my article.” Well, if your mom is in fact proud of such “work”, then I’m happy both for her and you. But, I refuse to believe that she or you can objectively say that what you do is noble or even something to be proud of. You are a corporate sellout, pure and simple. It requires no intelligence or skill to do what you do. No original thought at all.

I’m sure you consider yourself a “writer”. You are not (well, at least not based on this one article. Perhaps you do real work on the side or something). You collect words and ideas from other people and create money for big business. You are one step above writing out hallmark cards.

I doubt you went to college with the aspirations of writing such mediocre work. Reread your article about Seinfeld and sincerely ask yourself if you are “proud” of it. In your defense of your mistake, you didn’t say “one wrong word in an otherwise intelligent article.” Instead, you pointed to the volume of the article, 35,000 words. Is that how you define your work? By quantity over quality? If so, that’s a shame. And, in addition to its mediocrity and pointlessness, you should also be ashamed of the fact that you exploited someone else’s work. You had nothing to do with Seinfeld, and yet you felt completely comfortable with exploiting it for your own profit. If you had written a review of the show, or somehow had an original thought, then it would have been ok to reference it. However, simply collecting the funny moments under the guise of being sports related and slapping together a nice little bullet point list is NOT original. It’s not even writing.

And seriously, “no bread for you” is more than just a one word mistake. Not all words are created equally in a real writing (that has originality and thought). It’s practically the title of your article, and you butchered it. Yikes.

Ok, I look forward to your defense of your article and/or profession (should you take the time out to actually respond). I’m curious as to how you can justify your work. Perhaps there is something I am missing. And, as for anonymity, my name is Dennis J*********, and I’m far from a High school student.

Have a great day,


"I loved playing football, but the reasons I loved football were just to feed my ego," Williams said. "And any time you feed your ego, it's a one-way street."

What an intelligent thing to say. Unfortunately, it's completly lost on the sports world. That quote gets drowned out by the macho "he let us down", "he's a pot head who is a quitter", "what a flake", etc etc.

This guy is better than you (sports fans). He's above you, and football is beneath him. You need sports to fill a void in your life, but he doesn't.

If i quit my job to do something else, am i "letting everyone down"? Should i choose to come back, i don't see why i would need to "apologize to everyone". Uh, it's my life, i'll come and go as i please. and don't give me a "he left right before training camp". He was talking about leaving for a LONG time and people, selfish people who want to exploit his life for their own perosnal gain, kept trying to convince him to stay.

I wish there was a way to root for Ricky Williams on something other than the football field. I respect him as a human being.

"take off your sunglasses so you'll see better"  


I just got out of bed to write a rant, that's how much that opening line got to me. The amazing race is all about internal conflict among the teams of two, probably to the point of overkill. It may be a little too early to tell, but i'm thinking this show has jumped the shark. Having one heel team yell at each other the whole show is entertaining, having ALL the teams do it is boring.

But anyway, one of the nagging women actually told the guy (i think their team is called "formerly dating") to take off his glasses before a cannoing (sp) competiton so he can see better. Step back and think about that one for a second. She's so presumptuous (sp again) to think that she's in a better position to judge his vision than himself (grammar?) Has anyone had that done to them? I get it all the time and it's the textbook definition of "mind boggling".

You need a coat, it's cold = I'm cold therefore you must be cold.
You need two heaters in your apartment, not one = It was cold when i came into your apartment today. Even though i've never been in your apartment at night when the space heater is running, i'm going to just assume you need two.

oh i wish i could think of the dozens and dozens of examples that I've had to endure. It would make this post more coherent. Needless to say, the line "take off your sunglasses" will forever be embedded in my head now. For a moment, i felt that guy's pain. I knew exactly how he felt. She thought so little of him that she couldn't even trust him to judge his own eyesight!

i wouldn't believe it if i didn't see it with my own eyes  


let me add one tidbit...  


i don't think for one second that artest's actions could be considered "self defense" from a legal standpoint. in theory, he probably broke the law. But i still don't think he should be prosecuted. (and yes, this will open a whole new can of worms since i tend to argue for full enforement of the law)

perception meets reality with the Pacers fight  


I must have watched the replays of the pacers/pistons fight a dozen times at the bar last night (on mute). While I strongly believe the Pacers were in the "right" as much as anyone can be who's involved in a fight, i was expecting the media reaction to be "there goes artest again". Well, much to my relief, the espn crew (i don't know their trademarked name, but the one with steve s. smith), were all in agreement....the fans were the ones out of line.

I'm not sure what the proper reaction is to having a beer/cup/bottle thrown in your face. I don't think i would react by punching the person, but i do know that i'm on the far end of the spectrum. I would expect that the vast majority of people, if that was done on the street, would react the same way Artest did.

The only question, then, becomes whether as a professional athlete, his actions must be judged at a higher standard. I don't think that they do. There's a line when it comes to fans vs. players. As an avid heckler, I DO think it's apart of the game. I know announcers discredit this theory, but i DO think that buying a ticket entitles me to certain liberties at the expense of the players. If all i cared about was watching the game, i could do that at home (for free). When you are in the arena/stadium, you are apart of the game. There's a level of interaction and participation there that warrants some level of heckling.

But here is where the line is drawn: No swearing, no personal references (there are exception to that limitation), and CLEARLY nothing physical.

These athletes are huge celebrities. In what other area of entertainment can you get that close to a celebrity? They allow themselves to be vulnerable to thousands of fanatic, sometimes drunken, fans. At any moment, they can be attacked. And somehow, we ask them to forget about all that and entertain us for 3 hours a night.

If and when a fan crosses a line, the player has the absolute right to defend themselves. And not just on the immediate/direct level. If artest doesn't defend himself against that one detroit fan, perhaps other fans in other arenas will take that as a cue to push the envelope even more.

Security should have done a better job to stop the situation immediately. Artest lacked faith in the security and took it upon himself. Of course there were numerous consequences of going into the stands that Artest didn't account for. And yes, he probably made the situation worse in the immediate (can i end that part of the sentence w/ that word? i can't think of what should follow immediate), but I still don't blame him.

He did what he believed what was right, he did what many others in his situation would do, and most importantly, i think that his actions will have a long term benefit on his, and his peers, safety.

Oh, and detroit is off the list of possible places for our new capital. They deserve their reputation.

- I also didn't like the piston's CEO sayign it all started b/c artest was laying on the table and thus didn't keep the table as a barrior between him in the fans. Like a bottle wouldn't be able to cross that imaginary line.

- I'm officially a pacers fan after this. I can't believe i rooted for the pistons last year.

I refuse to do the press junket / circuit, or whatever it's called  


When an actor is promoting a movie, they'll do something called a junket (i think that's the name, but i could be wrong). Basically, he sits in a chair and gets mini interviews with TONS of local stations all in rapid fire sucession. They all ask the same generic, boring questions, but it's "unique" b/c local reporter johnny lunchpail is asking them.

I would lose my mind within 15 minutes.

I'm dealing with something similar now that i'm "estranged" from my lawschool friends. Instead of seeing these people on a daily basis, it's now much less frequent. In fact, there were some people on saturday that i haven't seen since the bar. Every conversation went like this:

A) what have you been up to for the past two months? How is your job?
B) my job is _____. I do this ______. how about you?
A) my job is also ______. I've been up to _____.
B) [turns to c] So, what have you been up to?

rinse and repeat.

I can't take it. You want to know what i'm up to? try staying in touch with me. My job isn't my life. I'm not going to give 4 recaps a year of my life and still hold onto the pretense that we are still friends. Let it go, it's over.

Tillman was the wind beneath my wings.  


What a hero. He gave up EVERYTHING to defend freedom. He gave up his life for what he believed in. Now, i seriously doubt he spent the time necessary in researching an issue to make sure it was worthy of such a sacrafice, but that doesn't matter. Oh no, with reckless abandon, he grabbed the nearest gun and said "point me in the right direction, sarge."

And of course, the complexity surrounding the issue warrants deep reflection and analysis. All of which can now be captured in a RED BRACELET. Wow, what am i supposed to do with my yellow one now? My mind hurts.

Lastly, i know there were a bunch of other people that gave up their lives for what THEY believed in...but i just can't put my finger on it. Tip of my tongue....something about flying planes....were they heroes?

shouldn't space heaters point up?  


this space heater i have is very strong. But, it's about a foot high. If it was pointed up at an angle, the warmth would at least be directed towards me. As it is now, i'm burning my ankles trying to get close to the heat.

I'm sure these people were thinking "well, heat rises, so it doesn't matter", but clearly this heater is small enough where it can only be effective if it's directly on you. I don't understand why it's not pointed up. Was it designed for midgets?

my apology to english muffins  


I've always been anti-english muffin. I've recently come to the realization that my disdain for them is based entirely on my love affair of bagels. Bagels are the greatest food on earth, and if i could have a bagel a day for the rest of my life, i'd die a happy person. But they are an endangered species now, as the bagel place by my grandmother went out business and i haven't found a suitable replacement. So, in an attempt to fill the void, i try to get into english muffins.

Comparing an english muffin to a bagel is unfair. However, they aren't half bad. Compare them to the lowly piece of toast or even a dry roll, and they are almost "good".

of course, making pizza-english muffins when they raisins in them probably wasn't the best idea in the world.

this is how i planned my saturday night  


I wanted to watch a dvd, but couldn't decide which one. Then i thought "every week, i wind up watching a movie on tv that i own on dvd. It's not as good on tv with the commericals and editing, but i do it anyway just b/c i get sucked in." So, i thought i'd let TNT (or whatever channel i watch movies on), pick the movie for me. Just my luck, they were playing donnie brasco.

Then i got sucked into it (halfway through), and never bothered to put the dvd in.

god i'm lazy.

Support the Cancer Troops  


Why wont the yellow bracelets go away? I can see through people.

The bracelet is the unique status symbol that is intentionally cheap. It's a "look at me, i'm going to wear something cheap b/c i care about the issue." The average person would not feel comfortable wearing this with a real outfit (uh, lawyers at work) if they hadn't first seen celebrites do it. Come on, a yellow bracelet 24/7? Why?

And don't for one second tell me you care about cancer. Do something about it like Race for the cure. Those things actually contribute to fighting the problem. Donating a dollar does not. And, if the bracelet wasn't involved, would you even have donated that dollar? Nope.

The only good thing about the bracelet is that i can immediately spot the marks. It's like they are tagged as conformists. They'll continue to wear these bracelets for a few months and then move onto the next tickle me elmo, beanie baby or other fad.

I don't really have anything to add regarding the yellow magnets currently on cars that "support the troops". It's the same type of thinking, but obviously more dangerous.