I knew I was in trouble when I put Stern on while getting ready for work. The show is so good that I wind up not being able to turn it off. Today was extra troubling because after the live broadcast, they are replaying the first show (1/9/06) and then another show w/ the 10 best clips of all time. In other words, if there was something good on in the morning, there was not necessarily going to be a chance to catch a replay of it.

ANYWAY....

I'm sure the majority of listeners did not enjoy this little moment as much as I did, but to me, this is the reason why I listen every morning. As you know, Artie is battling an ongoing weight problem. Well, that's not enitrely accurate, as at this point, he basically waiving the white flag and admitting defeat. The closest he's come to dieting is giving up Soda for New Years (and switching to Hi/C fruit punch.

Stern and the rest of the group have poetically bounced back and forth between "tough love" and "morbid curiosity". They tell Artie he has a problem, and try to get him to slow down, while also enjoying the disgusting display of glutiny. You can't help but feel bad for Artie, while simultaneously laughing at his plite.

This morning, in honor of their first year on the air, Sirius brought in a breakfast buffet for the show.

Gary barked into his microphone that the food was going fast, and that anyone on the air who wanted something should put the order in now.

While looking at video of the buffet, Artie commented on how nice the ommlette station looked. He started to hint that he wanted an omlette made for him when Howard cut him off (not intentionally, he just started talking) and told Gary that it was nice of him to offer, but everyone outside the studio should enjoy the breakfast.

Artie then got quiet. Gary then got very motherly and directly asked Artie if he would like something. Artie was shy, but Gary forced it out of him that he'd enjoy a cheese omlette. "How about i make you a nice little dish, would you like that? The omlette, a little bacon, maybe a bagel." Artie perked right up and got excited.

Howard then jumped in and encouraged Artie to eat. "Gary, make it extra cheese, my boy needs his nurishment." I think Howard got the vibe that Artie was embarassed about making the food request, and was trying to make it easier on him (by making a joke of it).

Then, 30 seconds later, Howard goes "wait, you don't want the bagel too, do you? Didn't I already see you eat a bagel this morning? Don't you feel disgusting eating two bagels for breakfast?"

Artie couldn't defend himself. His pain is my pleasure.