When I ordered my drinks last night, here are the statements that were made between me and the waitress:
1) Me: "I'd like a Dos Equis Lager" {mispronounced Lager}
2) Me: "Lager" {had to repeat the word Lager}
3) Me: "and a water"
4) Her: "Bottle or tap/draft?" {honestly can't remember if she said tap or draft}
5) Me: "Bottle"
6) Me: "wait, what do you have on tap?"
7) Her: {lists the beers on tap}
8) Me: "oh, I'll take a blue moon"
The order in which I wrote those statements is what I think happened. However, I'm fully willing to admit that #4 might have come as i was saying #2 because there was an awkward pause after i stumbled over the words the first time (i made a mental note of that because I was mentally practicing how to say dos equis before she came to the table). If #4 comes early, then #5 might have come right after #3 or maybe before #3. But I guarantee these were the only lines said.
Needless to say, I was very surprised when she brought me my beer, then the round of tap waters, and THEN a bottle of water for me. When I started to express my confusion, the knuckle draggers that I was with insisted that I had asked for a bottle of water. After a couple of seconds, I understood where the miscommunication came from, but they wouldn't listen b/c they had two infallible arguments:
1) They heard me ask for a bottle of water
3) There are three of them, and only one of me.
Now, few people understand the burden of being so superior to the people around you, but the pressure can be overwhelming. For the record, here's what obviously happened:
A) Because I said "Lager" twice, it could have sounded like "I'd like a dos equis Lager, Lager [which sounds like bottle] and a [slurred together to sound like "of"] water.
B) When I answered "bottle" to her beer question, it was so close to my water request, that people associated the words together. Bottle and water next to each other in speech must mean a bottled water. This is the most likely scenario because there would have been some overlap between the waitresses comments and my own. She didn't seem overly sharp, and was writing down our orders, so there may have been a delay in her awareness that dos equis comes in both bottles and draft. [This is even more probable when one realizes that she was Stumped when I asked her what's on tap. She started with an "uhhh" and then trailed offer after 3 beers were listed.]
Now, here's what's NOT likely.
C) I asked for a bottled water. Why is this not likely? Because Freudian slips, or just general mispoken words tend to result from something that's on the mind. I would never, ever order a bottled water. To be honest, I wouldn't even be confident that they existed at a place like this. Furthermore, when someone misspeaks, it's done out of mental laziness. The speech is such 2nd nature, that it's almost done by impulse. However, I was as aware of my speech at that moment as I have ever been. Again, i was preparing to say dos equis lager in my head in the minutes preceding the order AND i heard myself say it incorrectly when I ordered. I was fully and 100% aware of what i was saying, word for word. I have a VIVID memory of what I said.
There's not a doubt in my mind that I did not order a "bottled water". Now, i'm FULLY willing to admit that my order could be misunderstood. A "throw momma from the train, a kiss" type of situation. I harbor no ill will at the waitress for messing up this order. It was an honest, and most likely repeatable, mistake.
However, the knuckledraggers around me who insisted that I said bottled water are the real culprits here. It's so sad and pathetic that I can understand how their minds work better than they can themselves. No wonder this country is such a mess. People don't even have the capacity to understand why they think the way they do.
Now, I know they were just being stubborn towards the end to pile on. But if they really couldn't see why they connected "bottle" to "water", then ....... ok, there's no end to that sentence. then they suck, i guess.
1) Me: "I'd like a Dos Equis Lager" {mispronounced Lager}
2) Me: "Lager" {had to repeat the word Lager}
3) Me: "and a water"
4) Her: "Bottle or tap/draft?" {honestly can't remember if she said tap or draft}
5) Me: "Bottle"
6) Me: "wait, what do you have on tap?"
7) Her: {lists the beers on tap}
8) Me: "oh, I'll take a blue moon"
The order in which I wrote those statements is what I think happened. However, I'm fully willing to admit that #4 might have come as i was saying #2 because there was an awkward pause after i stumbled over the words the first time (i made a mental note of that because I was mentally practicing how to say dos equis before she came to the table). If #4 comes early, then #5 might have come right after #3 or maybe before #3. But I guarantee these were the only lines said.
Needless to say, I was very surprised when she brought me my beer, then the round of tap waters, and THEN a bottle of water for me. When I started to express my confusion, the knuckle draggers that I was with insisted that I had asked for a bottle of water. After a couple of seconds, I understood where the miscommunication came from, but they wouldn't listen b/c they had two infallible arguments:
1) They heard me ask for a bottle of water
3) There are three of them, and only one of me.
Now, few people understand the burden of being so superior to the people around you, but the pressure can be overwhelming. For the record, here's what obviously happened:
A) Because I said "Lager" twice, it could have sounded like "I'd like a dos equis Lager, Lager [which sounds like bottle] and a [slurred together to sound like "of"] water.
B) When I answered "bottle" to her beer question, it was so close to my water request, that people associated the words together. Bottle and water next to each other in speech must mean a bottled water. This is the most likely scenario because there would have been some overlap between the waitresses comments and my own. She didn't seem overly sharp, and was writing down our orders, so there may have been a delay in her awareness that dos equis comes in both bottles and draft. [This is even more probable when one realizes that she was Stumped when I asked her what's on tap. She started with an "uhhh" and then trailed offer after 3 beers were listed.]
Now, here's what's NOT likely.
C) I asked for a bottled water. Why is this not likely? Because Freudian slips, or just general mispoken words tend to result from something that's on the mind. I would never, ever order a bottled water. To be honest, I wouldn't even be confident that they existed at a place like this. Furthermore, when someone misspeaks, it's done out of mental laziness. The speech is such 2nd nature, that it's almost done by impulse. However, I was as aware of my speech at that moment as I have ever been. Again, i was preparing to say dos equis lager in my head in the minutes preceding the order AND i heard myself say it incorrectly when I ordered. I was fully and 100% aware of what i was saying, word for word. I have a VIVID memory of what I said.
There's not a doubt in my mind that I did not order a "bottled water". Now, i'm FULLY willing to admit that my order could be misunderstood. A "throw momma from the train, a kiss" type of situation. I harbor no ill will at the waitress for messing up this order. It was an honest, and most likely repeatable, mistake.
However, the knuckledraggers around me who insisted that I said bottled water are the real culprits here. It's so sad and pathetic that I can understand how their minds work better than they can themselves. No wonder this country is such a mess. People don't even have the capacity to understand why they think the way they do.
Now, I know they were just being stubborn towards the end to pile on. But if they really couldn't see why they connected "bottle" to "water", then ....... ok, there's no end to that sentence. then they suck, i guess.
powered by performancing firefox
This entry was posted
on Sunday, March 11, 2007
at Sunday, March 11, 2007
. You can follow any responses to this entry through the
comments feed
.
